No choice - i need to do so!

The only way i can study abroad is to depend on scholarships.
This is because my parents aren't well-off enough to send me overseas.
Study abroad is one of my dreams!
My parents asked me regarding my scholarship applications.
They wondered why i chose oversea programs for all my scholarship applications.
They also asked me the reasons why i can't study in local university.
I didn't know how to answer them at that moment!
I told them i want go study abroad because that is the only way i can go oversea.
That time, i was not think carefully before i spoke out my point of view!
I understood now, they worried about me!
What i need to do now is try to equip myself with knowledge, improve my communication skill, do a little homework, less socialize, etc......
I hope that i can secure any scholarship either study abroad or local as long as it's recognized by MQA.
If can't, i think i will go to private, of course UTAR is not in my choices!
Maybe try to apply UNITEN-closing date-30 May 2008!
I regretted that i didn't hear the advice of counselor. She advised me go to study in private college starting Jan 2008 using my trial results. But it's over dy.
Now, i should think it carefully what is my real ambition and what should i do to achieve this ambition?
Now, not the time for me to play, not the time for me to socialize, not the time for me to do nothing! But, it's the time for me to think how is my future?.. What should i do to achieve it?.. I should start searching for my real ambition, for my real tasks!
I was born in the Earth- so i think that i got some tasks to fulfilled, my mum and dad and my relatives, all of them hope me can contribute something to my big family!
Maybe i will become the first of the family members to study abroad-i hope that i'm not a day-dreamer!
KPLSPM-be a teacher!- I think i can do it if i willing to do it, but now my problem is my communication skill. I hope that my interview experiences like JPA and Sime Darby already improve my confidence while talking!
Go ahead, i can do it!
Believe my own abilities!