oRdINaRy LiFe

I am an ordinary village girl. I grew up in a small village town, Temangan. I finished my preschool education at SRJK (C) Chung Hwa, Kelantan with an ordinary results. I spent my childhood mostly with my neighbors' children, they are about my ages but none of them are same age as me. Some are older than me while some are younger than me. The gap is about one to four years only. Now, most of them have their own lives and same of them have even married. We rarely contact with each other as we are having our own life.

After that, my family consists of my parents and my twin brother moved to Tanah Merah, 15 minutes away from my previous house, my grandma's house. I took my primary education at SRJK (C) Yuk Cheng. I was enrolled into M class while my brother was enrolled into K class. However, my parents appealed so that we were enrolled into the same class. Their appeal succeeded. Both of us were enrolled into M class. As first 2 year of primary didn't according to the abilities of the students, we were in the same class for 2 years. I didn't socialize well with my friends. Most of them had known each other before enrolling into the primary education because they were in the same class during preschool education.

Year 3 onward, i was in the first class which was S for Setia. However, i had always been nominated as the last scorer of the class. My classmates laughed at me. I felt ashamed. I didn't score well for every single subjects except for mathematics. I didn't go for tuition. Most of my classmates did because they are rich. My family couldn't afford the tuition fees that time. My parents taught us Malay language during the night. However, this activities was fading away. Year 1 to year 2, my brother and I was in nursery center as both of our parents were working. Year 3 onward, we stayed at home alone. Year 5 onward, we went to school by ourselves. I cycled to school. I didn't befriend a lot of people. I was an anti-social person. During primary school, i started to socialize when i was in year 5. Although it was a starting point, i am glad our friendship remains until today.

During primary education, i joined ping pong and chess. Besides, i was quite active for track and field. Although i always lost, i learned a lot about friendships. Most of my classmates are rich, they have a good background and i was the only one who can't socialize well with them. Thus, i befriend with other classes students. I realized that i was same as them, i shouldn't be enrolled into the first class. It made my life miserable. My misconception towards my classmates made our relationship worse. They didn't care about existence and i didn't care about their presence.

Year 6, we all were facing UPSR. Although i was in the first class, the teachers didn't put high target on me. They target me to score 1A6B. I managed to score 3A3B1C. That results was considered okay for me during that time as i was just an ordinary student.. As conclusion, my primary education was dull and ordinary. I didn't have much achievements except for scoring 100 for my mathematics which was quite ordinary nowadays.

Year 2003, i enrolled into Form 1. With my ordinary results, i was enrolled into the fifth class out of 13 classes. I was in another school named SMK Dato Mahmud Paduka Raja (1). Form 1, i was still alone. I was sitting at the back as i couldn't manage to get a place in front. I guess before i was mad with my neighbor which made us separated our table. However, my relationship with others were getting better. Some felt pity for the unfair treatment by my classmates. I was not sure how i survive in form 1, i knew i managed to be number 1 in the class, however, this made my classmates hated me more. Form 1 was really a remarkable and an embarrassing episode of my life. This time i started to go for tuition. Although it's much as others did, i thought it was enough. I started to have friends. However, whether they were true friends or not, that's out of my prediction.

Year 2004, i was in form 2, I began to befriend other but still i was unbearable with my brother attitude, he started to skip classes, play truant, and even fought with other students. I was called to meet the counselor to settle my twin brother's things. The story never ended like that, i had to call parents and explain everything to them which sometimes i wished i could go back to class and continue the lecture. My form 2 life was a quite challenging life as i had to start settling my brother misconducts and settling my academic stuff. My results was jumped from 3A in form 1 to 5A in form 2.

Year 2005, PMR year, this year i still had to settle my brother stuff in addition to my academic stuff. I was focusing more on my studies and i managed to score 7A throughout the year. I did join clubs and societies but i was just an inactive member as most of my friends did. I am proud to be part of SPN1 family as most of us score 7A, for the chinese students. Thanks. Although there were quarrels amongst throughout those three years, there are none except strengthen our friendships. Besides, my friendship with other classes students were getting better except with those in the first class. Yeah, i did want to score better than them. However, my friendship with the Malays were good although some of them were in the first class.

After PMR, i was working in the sundry shop together with my friends. I was working as a cashier. I think about 1.5 months. The experience i gained was worth.

Maybe my attitude and my behavior towards studies let people think that i was dominating. With my excellent results (for my school, 7 A in PMR is excellent enough), i managed to enter the first class of science stream. Starting year 2006, i started to socialize more. Initially, i had mind to change to accounting stream but the teachers didn't allow met to do so. At last, i just took extra subject for my spm. At first, i was almost given up my chinese language. However,  i am glad i didn't do so because i managed to score A2 for it. Form 4 and form 5 were the most exciting years for me during my secondary education. Although there were some quarrels, i still think that it was a remarkable quarrel. Form 4, i didn't really study much but others said i did. I started to socialize and thanks to my friends for letting me to become part of the family of chinese language society. I learned about organization and i learned how it worked. Besides, we conducted camps and activities.

Moreover, i started to prove myself by writing essay in bm and managed to win a prize for it. I joined ping pong which i won without competitors. I joined taekwondo which i almost gave up. I joined chess until state level.  I joined quizzes by representing schools. Although i didn't have much achievements like others did, i am proud with myself. There were a lot of things happened during my high school year. There were many "first" things i did like drinking liquors which didn't taste nice at all, gambling which i didn't get addicted, countdown party which i learned about cooking, mentoring my friends which i thought it was useless, camping with friends which created memories, etc.

During the holiday after form 4, i stayed a week at Buddhist temple or  "WAT" with my friends. I learned more about Buddhism.

My life during form 4 and form 5 were more colorful.

After finishing SPM, my life started to change dramatically.

I have blogged after my life after SPM and thus i won't want to blog about it again.

My friends coverage area is getting smaller and smaller. My friends who are still contacting me are decreasing. To those who are still keeping in touch with me, thanks a lot. I hope i won't forget you all forever. Thanks, friends.